Second Beta - 20dp3dt

First the number-3266!!!

I'm still standing by the fact that seven days between betas is torture but waiting to receive your phone call until almost 3:00 in the afternoon on the day of beta is even worse!  I told Jamie last night that for me the second beta is harder than the first because you were able to feel the hope of being pregnant for a week.  My mind wandered a few times to what the future would be like, etc. To possibly have that amazing feeling ripped away after a bad second beta would have killed me because like it or not my hope in this little bean growing inside of me has grown each day. 

Since Jamie received our call from the nurse last week at 10:59 with the beta, we very naively thought that the call would come around that time today.  Once again I gave the Dr.'s office Jamie's phone number because I was too freaked out to answer the call. I called Jamie at 11:30 when I left my work to see if he heard anything, he had not so I headed out his direction for lunch.  We went to Grassi's for lunch, sat mostly in silence while we ate nervously.  Lunch was over at 12:30 so we decided to head to a mall to walk around, that turned into walking the entire mall and sitting in the atrium listening to a pianist until 2:00.  By this time I wanted to scream.  Jamie even called the Dr.'s office and asked for the nurse to call which I always try not to do because I know they will call and I know they are busy and as I explained to him talking to the nurse earlier doesn't change the outcome.  So I felt the need to leave the mall as the pianist was not easing any fears I had.  I took Jamie back to work, dropped him off and came home to lay in bed.  My hip is killing me today for some reason so laying down feels good.

To calm myself today I kept reflecting on the fact that I have felt a lot of pregnancy symptoms this week.  I have been so tired I went to bed at 7:00 one night, I left work early one day and slept and I slept in my car during lunch yesterday.  I have had a gagging sensation in my throat and I feel like I am going to be sick if I don't eat every few hours.  I was lying in bed this afternoon thinking how would I explain all of these symptoms I have been telling Jamie about if the beta number today comes back at like 2!?!

Anyway, I dozed off for a couple of minutes and I heard the garage door close downstairs.  I laid in bed wondering if Jamie was going to come up to bring me good or bad news.  A few minutes went by and I decided to text Jamie to see if he was here, maybe I was just imagining I heard something.  I didn't get a response but I swore I kept hearing things so I walked downstairs and said "Jamie?"  I heard "Hold on Amber."  I rounded the corner to the office and he was on the phone which I figured was a client.  All of a sudden my heart sunk as I figured he had the news by now and I was about to hear it..  And then I got a smile and a thumbs up!  He was on the phone with the nurse at that moment!  We gave each other a five and I cried out of happiness and we both teared up after Jamie hung up. Is this really happening? 

Our very first ultrasound is scheduled on June 17 at 10:40 AM with an exam following at 11:00AM.  Two days before Jamie's birthday we will hopefully see the heart beat of a beautiful little star!  Oh this makes my heart melt, I am so happy and so proud, I just hope things keep progressing wonderfully.  I want this so badly.