I got to work at 6:45 this morning. The office was quiet with just a couple people buzzing around. I sat at my desk, looked at my calendar and was excited to think today is the day we have been waiting for. Tonight while preparing dinner for our guests, J and I will both take our antibiotics, a lowered dose of lupron and our first follistim injection...finally. I love coming to work on Friday's because they are half days but also because I get to cross three days off my calendar-Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Crossing three days off makes our goal that much closer. This time I also flipped the page to a new month, our month I hope, May. I started thinking of all the things that I hope May will hold for my J and I. I'm not a very religious person but I did go to Church when I was younger and I do pray from time to time. I said a quick prayer.
I asked God to watch over us as we pursue our dream of having a child. I promised him that I would make this child my first priority in life and would make it my mission to raise a child that felt wanted and loved. I would give this child all of the good things I have been afforded in life and do my best spare it all of the negative things. I would help guide this child to be a loving, responsible, caring, intelligent person. I would give this child all that I have if we could be so lucky as to have a successful IVF cycle this time.
I also prayed for my sister-in-law and her husband who are experiencing tough times right now after a job loss. There have been many times in my life where I have wanted to help someone so badly but haven't been sure as to how. I feel powerless. I told her that although we cannot help financially that I am here to listen and give advice, I just wish I could do more.